A Conversation With . . . YOURSELF?!?

I have been so remiss in writing I think the one follower I have will delete me – thank you, by the way, whoever you are! But I digress . . .

Years ago – oh, who am I kdding – DECADES ago, at a job I had as a secretary/receptionist (Yes, folks, a “SECRETARY” not an “ASSISTANT”! I don’t know what the caffuffle is about calling yourself a secretary when that is exactly your job description! But, again, I digress . . .) one of the gentlemen I was doing typing for caught me talking to myself – and to my typewriter (yes, TYPEWRITER! There were days l-o-o-o-o-n-g ago when there really weren’t computers on every desk!).

O.K. You might want to grab an “Inge” roadmap for this one as it seems my thought-processes are all over the place this morning! Again! The digression! (Love that word, all-encompassing!)

Anyway . . . when I looked up embarassingly and saw John watching me, this is what he said: “You can talk to yourself. You can even answer yourself.” (Something that I also always do!) He continued “But you know you’re in (real) trouble if you say ‘Pardon me’!” Think about it for a minute – it will sink in.

So, conversations with yourself. That’s not really a bad thing. I know some will say (jokingly, I hope, although there are people who REALLY MEAN IT) that they can’t find anyone else to have an intelligent conversation with. The people who do mean it may just have lost their sense of humour somewhere along the way. Just think, though, all that people could learn from you if they overheard some of those talks with yourself. Your likes and dislikes; your sense of humour that you hide with others; that temper you try (operative word being “try”) to keep under wraps; and, even the heartache you refuse to show others. Then there are the arguments that you have with yourself. Just think, you’ll finally end up the winner of an argument or three! And last but not least, people might actually realize that the strength you show in so many different ways comes from THE always-listening, all-seeing, all-knowing Father above that hears every. Word. You. Say. And loves you anyway.

You might even learn something about yourself. Just think about it – you can’t ignore the person talking to you; you can’t walk out on the argument; you can’t even hang up the phone! These are conversations and arguments that need completing – unless you want to leave yourself hanging mid-gripe. But if you do that, the ever-changing highways and biways of your thought processes might end up in traffic jams and pileups, causing an unwanted listerner to summon the “little white wagon”, and then the only way you can communicate with others is through Morse Code as you bounce off the walls!! You’ll still have yourself to debate with, argue with, laugh and cry with – unless they muzzle you, too.

There is so much to say on the subject I’m confusing myself at the moment! Which is another reason to have these never-ending convo’s with yourself – trying to make sense out of the number one super-highway called LIFE!

Until next time,
Inge

Why Do It

O.K. Why do I keep writing when I’m sure no one reads this? If only to prove to myself I can. This has yet to become a regular occurance. In another irony of life, when my intentions are to publish an article on a regular basis, I have had the busiest few weeks in litterally decades! It seems that I’ve woken up to life and realized an entire generation has grown up while I’ve basically lived my life in a catatonic state of “what does it matter?” Except for my son, life had no meaning. He is now going to be 35 and doesn’t want any part of me. (THAT is a whole SERIES of Blogs!)

Why do it? Why do bakers bake? To create delctible eddibles. Why do artists paint? To express an inner part of themselves on canvas that no one else can see. Why do extreme runners run, or hikers hike? All these characters have one thing in common: a burning desire of . . . something they can’t explain.

This “something” can be found in each and every one of us. Believe me, if I can wake up from a 25 year “WHATEVER-you-want-to-call-it” anyone can find that “burning” within themselves. On disabilitly? You, too, have something to share. On meds for one reason or another? This, too, can be managed so you can find the “YOU” you’ve misplaced.

Confused? That’s as good a beginning as anything. EVERYONE has something special to give. A smile; a kind word; a listening ear. Not all of us are able to do the hikes and bikes; cakes and lakes; swirls and curls; but WE. ARE. ALL. SPECIAL. All of us in our own way. And don’t let anyone – and I mean ANYONE – tell you different. Not sister or brother, husband or wife, mother or father, son or daughter. What do they have to do with this? That’s another Blog entirely.

REMEMBER: YOU! ARE! SPECIAL!

Until next time,
Inge

OH NO!! I LOST MY DAY TIMER!

We all want to think that we are on the ball, and have everything so organized we make neighbours think “No way can she do all that. WHAT is her secret? I WANT IT!!” You may look like you just breeze through your day with nary a hair out of place or the slightest sign of frustration in your walk, but you know better.

Appointments come up; emergencies seem to happen in multiples – not singles, and yet you seem to shrug and say “Eh, why fret?” Little do they know that were it but for your secret weapon, people would be visiting you in the looney bin where you would be communicating in Morse Code by bouncing off the walls! Your secret weapon?

The good ol’ Day Timer! You know the one. It’s this little – or huge if your eyesight is giving you trouble – book that you write everything down from appointments to coffe breaks; from checking in on a neighbour to exercise – and you KNOW that exercise keeps you sane, sort of. This little gem keeps track of almost every aspect of your life, however, if you’re at the point of scheduling your potty breaks in this gem of a book – YOU. NEED. HELP! But that’s another blog.

So. Since they have yet to develop a Day Timer that can be found by going into one of the App’s on your ever-so-smart phone, make sure you remember where you put yours down. It’s either that, or you buy two like me – or one for every room in your home!

Until next time,
Inge



What’s In A Word a.k.a “The Church Facade”

Perhaps this is apro-pos that tomorrow is Sunday. Or, in “Inge” language: “Nice Timing!” In fairness, I did not come up with the phrase “Church Facade”. This came from my Pastor, who shall remain nameless for the moment to protect his anonymity – and my hide!! (Joke – sort of!)

We’ve all said it – when we’re on “autopilot”; in some semblence of “sleepwalking”; or so “befuddled” that we don’t know what else to say. It’s the four-letter “f” word that lets people politely pass by, yet acknowledging you anyway. Yes, I said “politely”, so the word you’re thinking of probably isn’t the one I’m talking about! It’s the answer to the one question all of humanity has in common. It’s the response to “How are you doing?” If you’re honest with yourself right now, 99.9% of the time the answer is “I’m fine”. This lets the person who’s asking you off the hook – usually with a huge sigh of relief – and lets you stay “polite” as you answer the same question.

It’s not just in Church that this question comes up. It pops up on the telephone or in texting; with your neighbour in the hallway or in the street; with your pastor or postman; in business or on the bus; when in a crowd or content with two; the list is endless. In fairness, you definitely can’t listen E – V – E – R – Y time you ask the question, nor will you always be in a position to answer in detail to the same question. There are times, though, when someone really needs a sympathetic and caring ear, just as you sometimes really need to be the recipient of that same ear.

What am I getting at? W-W-W-E-L-L-L>> Keep this in mind: the next time you ask someone how they are doing, the LEAST you can do is stay in one place long enough to hear the person’s answer, and maybe, just maybe, you might find a pair of kind and compassionate eyes that see deep into yours as YOU silently scream “I need to talk!” Or those same pair of eyes might be the ones making the silent scream: “I am the one in pain!” As always, though, the ball will be in your court – whether question or answer.

Until next time,
Inge

Aching Hearts Leave Their Own Legacy

This morning – or by the time this is done it will be “this afternoon” – something has been weighing on me. As a matter of fact, it’s something always with me. Today’s Blog will be more of a serious one as I ask you to give thought to the other side of adoption. We hear so much about parents that have adopted children and how adoption has enriched the lives of both parent and child. I am not refuting that. I am asking you to think of the birth mothers out there today. I have left the poem exactly as when originally pen was put to paper; no tweaks, additions or deletions. Today, this is:

MY LEGACY TO LIFE

Flesh of my flesh, bone of my bone
Both I carried craddled beneath my heart
One I love in life – the other is loved through memory
But both I love equally and fiercely
One looks upon me with loving & trusting eyes
While the other looks upon another
Yet both remain forever a part of my heart, of my soul.

One is with me in body – the other in spirit
One I cry with – the other I cry for
One brings to my life sunshine, laughter and love
The other brings to my life a deep longing.

Both make their footprints upon this earth
One with me – the other without me
One continues to touch me with his presence
The other with her absence
and I continue to learn from both.

One is with me day & night, the other is with me no more
Yet bothe are deeply of my life, of my heart, of my soul
I may have given life to both,
. . . but both have returned life to me.

Would that the world could feel a tenth
of what he and she have given me.

written by Ingrid Ewikowski
March 4, 1996

Until next time,
Inge

No Regularity (9:00 p.m.)

As a writer – in prose, business, and/or as a new “blogger” – I do realize the benefits of being “regular”! And as visitors to this new “Blogger”, I leave it up to you to decide which meaning you would like to attach to the Title. Tonight’s irony, though, is that all good intentions – or mainly “Inge’s Intentions” – tend to find their way following the “All good intentions . . . ” route, also known as “Murphy’s Law”. On this new venture of mine, I had promised myself to accomplish something! Even if only to prove to myself that I can! The irony? (again!) lies with this last week being one of the busiest in quite awhile – rendering me more “scatter-brained” than usual – and believe me!! THAT’S saying a lot!

Where so many people can get along with only 6 hours of sleep (5 hours? 4? 3? Or am I going in the wrong direction?!) I am not one of them – and never have been as long as I can remember. So, for tonight, this Blog is just to say “Yeah, I’m still alive but only semi-kicking”. So many people can relate to setting out plans for the next day, week, or even 2-3 weeks – and then having “Life” step in. In my case, “Life” for me is my Heavenly Father Above. Every so often, even the Father needs to administer a “Knock” on the head when His “Gentle Nudging” doesn’t work. I need to be reminded that even though “scatter-brained” I am, I have to only put my faith in Him and His Spirit to Guide me. Why the “Knock” as oppose to the “Gentle Nudge”? Because for a control-freak like me, having that faith is not so easy to put into ACTION as it is to put in WRITING! (HUH? AGHAST! There actually IS someone out there that needs to be in control of E-EV-VER-RY THING! Why? LACK. OF. TRUST. (That would take another Blog – or 5 – to explain!) Hence, a week like last, and a day like today – a MIGRAINE – which is the “knock on the head” I’m referring to, both figuratively AND literally! And migraines for me are the “Real MacCoy” (sp?) – symptoms along with pain! To anyone who has them (migraines) no further description necessary. So, to both end last week, and begin this week; and . . .

To anyone reading this – and WHENEVER you read it – I wish you a fantastic week ahead, hopefully free of any “Garfield Monday’s”! (Anyone who is familiar with this lasagna-lovin’, Monday-hatin’ orange cat will know what I mean). Until next time.

Until next time
Inge

It Never Fails!

Every woman will know what I’m talking about when I say (or rather, YELL!): “WHERE ARE THE PANTS THAT FIT?!?!” When you know the weight came back – but you were hoping that at least ONE pair of jeans will still fit in the um, “lower” size. But then, 15 minutes before you’re to be at the door, YIKES! THEY DON’T FIT! So, in a frantic haze you run through your packed-away cloths (but kept in the “just-in-case” pile) to find the “bigger” size. Got ’em! OOPS! Wrong “bigger size” jeans – whoever sized them was REALLY in the stratosphere. Off they go – “Where did I put them?!”-screams emanating from you as jeans fly this way and that. FINALLY, FOUND THEM!! And we’re off to a day where the body rules you instead of you ruling your body. By the time the end of the day gets here you come home to the damages of the tornado that hit just before you left. I guess in some instances it’s not so bad that you have no room mate as you can decide whether to rearrange your wordrobe today – or leave the bulk of it for the next day. On a day when your body seems to be more in control than you, yourself, are, it’s not so bad to call an end to your day, put on your most comfy p.j.’s and fuel up for the morning. Snuggle up, folks, to your honey, teddy bear, or pillow – just so you “snuggle up” somewhere, somehow. Don’t forget to say your prayers – and pleasant dreams!

Until next time,
Inge

My First Blog Post

Greetings, fellow members of the human race. This blog is meant to be funny, sunny, sweet, sour, sometimes brutally honest, creatively sharing so that others might see that they are not alone. I come from the school of life. What I hope will happen here is a sharing of life’s moments so that others might learn. I am not a professional “anything”. What I share here comes from what I have learned throughout a lifetime of struggles, juggles, jiggles, wiggles, from childhood to now . . . and continuing on. My guidance comes from Above . . . Father, Son, and Holy Ghost my Guide and my Strength – even when I flounder, which I do so often – HE never deserts or departs. What comments or sharing I may offer are from me alone – one person, no scholastic degree, so please, take the words that will follow in future posts as coming from a flawed, floundering, sometimes water-treading 56-year-old women who despite life’s best shots is still here. Why am I here? That’s anybody’s guess!! Stay tuned, and again, WELCOME!

Be yourself; Everyone else is already taken.

— Oscar Wilde.

This is the first post on my new blog. I’m just getting this new blog going, so stay tuned for more. Subscribe below to get notified when I post new updates.

Greetings, fellow members of the Human Race!

I am trying for the second time to post my first blog!! You’re talking to (writing to? typing to? yelling to?) the world’s least technologically-inclined person to ever open a laptop/iPad/iPhone! What I do know – and it ain’t much – was self-taught, by trial and error – mostly error! What I’m hoping to do here with this blog is to share-and-care. I must say this right away – I am not a graduate of any school, course, or degree. I am not a doctor, teacher, counsellor – but I am a friend. What I will write comes from life’s juggles and struggles; jiggles and wiggles; laughter and tears; from peace to temper tantrums (and that just in the last 3 hours!). Basically . . . LIFE! My education is learned from early childhood to 56 years . . . and onward! I am a single woman and mother to an estranged 34-year-old son. Sometimes my posts will be in the form of poetry (mostly original); sometimes in the form of a tirade; sometimes laced with humour and other times with irony; and sometimes in the form of quiet introspection and inspiration with tears accompanying them all, I’m sure! I’m hoping someone might learn from me – as I’m hoping to learn from you. My posts will be an honest sharing of what life has taught me – and the roads I have travelled, with Father, Son and Holy Ghost as my Guide, then and now. What I share of myself will be an honest account, which I do not say this lightly, for how can someone learn from my travels through life if the pathways and roadways are curved instead of straight. Stay tuned for more – and buckle your seatbelts and keep those air-sick bags handy!

Until next time,
Inge